How to Be Calm in a Stressful Situation

1. Stop what you’re doing

1.1. Try counting to ten, or taking 3-5 deep breaths, before you reply in a heated conversation or situation.

2. Get some exercise

2.1. Exercise is a natural mood-booster because it releases endorphins, natural chemicals that make you feel calm and happy.

3. Repeat positive statements

3.1. “I can do this.” “I can do my best. That is all I can do. That is enough.” “I am bigger than my problems.” “My mistakes do not define me.” “I am human. We all make errors.” “This is temporary and will pass.” “I can ask for help when I need it.”

4. Focus on your senses

4.1. Notice each thing that is going on in your body, but try to avoid judging it. For example, if you’re worried about doing well on a final exam that’s in just a few minutes, you might notice to yourself, “My face feels hot and flushed. My heart is beating very fast. My palms feel sweaty. I feel nauseated.” Try to keep your noticing these things as neutral as possible.

5. Take some deep breaths.

5.1. Hold the breath for 1-2 seconds. Then, slowly exhale through your nose or mouth. Aim to exhale for a 4-count if you can. Repeat this process 6-10 times per minute for a few minutes.

6. Try to relax your muscles

6.1. Using progressive muscle relaxation, or PMR, can help release that tension and get you feeling more calm and relaxed. PMR focuses on consciously tensing and then releasing muscles by groups.